Sometimes I hear parents get confused about when they’re supposed to take their baby to the doctor. You know, how to tell the difference between an infection and a virus, or the severity of either. And I think this is weird. I mean it’s so simple.
But that’s probably because I have 4 kids. My experience is vast, my knowledge virtually endless. My oldest kid is 13 years old, so just imagine how many flus, colds, ear infections, tooth problems, respiratory infections and other ailments I have skillfully faced.
Since this has been a particularly sickly year for everybody, I thought I would share how to know when you’re supposed to take a baby to a doctor.
You can thank me later.
First, if the baby is a newborn, you take them at the first sign of anything at all whatsoever: Sniffles, cough, low fever, because it’s probably Ebola, polio, or whooping cough. If it’s your 2nd 3rd or 4th newborn, you do not take them immediately but rather wait 12 hours and then take them in. Because you’re more laid back now.
Do not argue with me. Just do it. There is no other way.
Once they’re past the newborn stage, it gets a little trickier. Luckily I’m here to help:
If they have a fever for more than 4 days you should take them in, but only if it’s not a low-grade fever, because a low-grade fever can be caused by teething.
Or walking pneumonia.
So it’s either teething or walking pneumonia.
There’s probably no way to know which is which, except for the cough. Do they cough when they lie down? Then it’s probably pneumonia, except that also happens when they have shit in their chests.
Get a stethoscope and listen to their chests. Do you hear scratching sounds? Yeah I’ve never actually heard anything either. Let’s move on to snot. Snot assessment is super reliable.
Is it snot green? Then it’s an infection. Actually that’s just an old wives’ tale.How long have they had snot? Six months? Oh right. They’re babies. That’s probably nothing. Don’t worry too much about snot.
Basically we’re here again.
But cough? You should worry about cough. Persistent cough is BAD. Except sometimes the cough from the cold 3 weeks ago is still happening, which is pretty fucking persistent, but in that case not a big deal.
Are we clear so far? Good. Let’s move on to raspy sounds.
If they have raspy sounds when they breathe you definitely need to take them in because that’s a respiratory infection, except also snot in the throat sounds pretty much exactly the same, so maybe it’s that.
It’s either something in the chest that needs antibiotics or it’s a virus.
You don’t get to know this though, ever.
Figure it out though because you don’t want to be one of those douche moms who takes their kid in for nothing plus you’ll be bringing them to a goddamn cesspool of kid germs UNNECESSARILY and sometimes even little infections will heal on their own through the power of breast-milk and good vibes so DO NOT OVERUSE ANTIBIOTICS ASSHOLE.
Super bugs and shit.
Are you taking notes? You probably should be. This wisdom was years in the making, pal.
Lethargy, however, that’s clear. If they’re lethargic, DO NOT DELAY. Except fever can kind of make them lethargic. You know, like your baby who never stops crawling starts lying his head on your chest and you’re like “THIS IS DEFINITELY LETHARGIC” so you go straight into the emergency room because the fever’s been there for 5 days TOO LONG FOR SURE but then you’ll get there and the nurse will give him Ibuprofen and 12 minutes later he’ll be flirting with the homeless man to his left and the strange thought will pass through your mind: “OMG would you please act sick like you have been FOR THE PAST FUCKING 3 DAYS?”
Then you’ll realize that’s a terrible and slightly insane thing to think and you’ll be grateful again, always, of course, that your baby isn’t really, actually sick.
But since you’re there you’ll see the doctor anyway and she will look at you like “No really, stop being such a fucking moron.” And you’re like “no really he’s sick” but your words are unconvincing since the “sick” baby in question is now grinning and waving frantically while playing peek-a-boo with a tongue depressor.
So basically, what I’ve learned after 13 years of parenting, endless colds and flus and viruses and strep and ear infections is this: I will always take my kids in too soon and 98% of those times my baby will suddenly, miraculously, for no apparent reason, become healed as we cross the threshold of the doctor’s office, successfully making me look like an ass ONE MORE FUCKING TIME and I will say to myself “Next time I’m not doing that.”
And the next time, I will move through the various aforementioned stages of virus vs. infection assessment and hold out and hold strong until exactly one day before they were going to get better. And then I will take them in because I AM ABSOLUTELY SURE THEY NEED ANTIBIOTICS OR SOMETHING but they don’t.
And I’ll feel dumb and like I’m wasting the doctor’s time. But I’ll walk out thinking “Well at least we know.” And I’ll swear I won’t do it again because I learned this time but I will, always.
I tell myself it’s better to look like an ass than be wrong.
I should know, I’ve been practicing both for approximately 13 years and 5 months.
Obviously, I’m an expert.
You’re welcome.
(in other words):
**************
Only 3 spots left in my May writing workshop.
Join us. Now. JUST FUCKING DO IT ALREADY.
Judy
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 13:10You are a younger version of me! Except I told my doctor I felt like a moron when I brought #4 in with his 94th case of “something which turned out to be nothing”. She told me it was MY job to notice if things were going wrong and it was HER job to decide how bad it really was. That took a huge weight off my shoulders, and because I live in Canada, I continued to grace her doorstep every time that baby (and the next :/ ) sniffled.
Good job, Mama.
Emily
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 12:12I had a friend whose doctor gave him the same advice. She said, “I look at this stuff all day; it’s my job to figure out whether you needed to come in or not, so never hesitate to come in.”
I just sort of always lean towards bringing them in. I guess it helps that our pediatrician’s office is never packed full of people with consumption and wasting diseases, and the practice is firmly pro-vax so I feel relatively safe from bad stuff. Plus, I learned early on that sometimes, my daughter has “silent” ear infections–no fever, no pain, no external signs, but her ears are absolutely filled with fluid and probably have been for a couple of weeks. You’re kind of damned if you do and damned if you don’t, so what the hell. Of course, now with #2 especially, it’s almost like the doctor has to make appointments with us, so there’s also that factor that makes me usually push off taking them in until at least the next business day. (I know that, hearing me talking about being busy with two kids, those of you with four or more kids are probably snorting laughter into your cups that you thought had cold coffee in them but instead have stickers, puzzle pieces, and unspecified liquids, and then you’re shaking your heads and me and deciding to sip it anyway because some of the liquids might still be coffee.)
I do also very seriously believe that you’ll never learn your kid if you don’t act on your instincts and find out what the result is. Plus, no matter how good the doctor is, you need to have an open dialogue with them so they can interpret what you’re telling them. I’m going to try to write this next in white so it has to be highlighted to be read, because it’s a sad story: A friend of mine from high school lost her little boy at 8 months last year. He had a cough and minor cold symptoms for a couple of months, and she kept bringing him in, and the pediatrician kept saying that it was normal and would go away, even though my friend said that it was the same cough that whole time. He seemed happy otherwise and mostly feeling good. He just went in the night, and at first they ruled the cause as SIDS. However, when they did the autopsy, they found MRSA in his lungs. I don’t know if that’s something the doctor could have found or treated, but I still feel like they should’ve taken her concern more seriously.
Emily
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 12:13Well, that didn’t work. Sorry. It’s a terrible story and I didn’t want anybody to come across it by surprise.
Melissa
Thursday, 9 April, 2015 at 16:52Well now I have to ask, what did the cough sound like?
Melissa
Thursday, 9 April, 2015 at 16:56Thank you for the warning and the story, it just reinforces that as mothers we should always trust our instincts. Do you know any more details about the symptoms your friend’s baby was having? As in, what did the cough sound like? What were the other cold like symptoms?
Laurel
Wednesday, 28 February, 2018 at 20:51I hope everyone, including doctors read that. MRSA is dangerous.
Samantha Gentle
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 13:14I totally agree you feel silly taking them when your not sure. Im currently going through this my daughter but finally gave in yesterday and took her to emergency as the general gps keep turning me away saying its just as cold as like most kids they look like death you rush them to the doctor and them bam they start running around the doctor surgery like they have never felt better in their life! So took her up to emergency and demanded and xray and turns out she quite a bad case of pneumonia! Its always best to trust your instincts! I knew something was wrong and has been for a while and the docs just keep palming me off, but why wouldnt they my daughter seemed fine everytime I took her there, she would prance around showing off, laughing, giggling climbing the walls like she was doped up to the max! Hopefully now they are treating her with antibiotics she will get better otherwise it will be a trip back the emergency room! Oh and she has also been tested for whooping cough! Fingers crossed it comes back negative!
Brandy
Thursday, 9 April, 2015 at 17:59i got pregnant with my twins when my daughter was only 7 months old~~been puked on, shit on, I actually had take a shit of one of my twin’s but!, the other twin broke his wrist once, THEN jump out of our treehouse in the middle of january and broke both of his arms, this time, he was 10…and i still had to wipe his ass!!!!
When it comes to my kids needing stiches, uggh I totally SUCK! 2 of the 3 have scares left behind because I AM NOT a DOCTOR, but the butterfly stitches i applied did wonders, so again BAD mommy,BUT ya know what? when one of my children need a doctor and they’re sick i must be honest I do the Mommy total power and control thing and make my diagnosis and 9 times out of ten it’s wrong but fuck it. theres no chapter in the mommy diaries that teaches you this crap. but ya know what? wing it, when all else fails wing, go with your gut, we’re moms….that’s what we do best….We always get it done…..
Jayme
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 13:22Thank you for this, today. I am currently battling the take in the 8 month old or ride it out scenario. You put complete faith in me that no matter what I choose I will still look like an ass, and that gives me just the shred of sanity I needed to make it through another day of teething feverish clingy baby. So, thanks.
PhysicsBear
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 13:28My browser is getting sick of the number of permutations of persistent cough that I’m finding to search for. He might have whipping cough, out croup, or pneumonia, or something I can actually treat, rather than just having a bloody irritating cough that keeps me awake at night.
Your parenting advice beats the crap out of anything else I’ve read 🙂
CSmith
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 14:02I’ve been doing this for 20 years so I’ve totally got it down, right? Yeah, right. I recently took my 3 yr. old in for a well-visit and took along my sick daughter because I was sure she had a sinus-infection. Nope, she had a cold, my perfectly fine 3 yr. old, however, had an ear infection in BOTH ears. This weekend, I was convinced that my daughter had appendicitis, low fever, severe pain in the lower to right side of her stomach, no signs of food related illness, two days of considering an ER visit and this morning she is totally fine. I swear they do it just to make us crazy.
Emily
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 12:15Yeah, it turns out I’m a really bad predictor of whether they actually have an infection or not! I’ve had years of chronic sinus infections, so my rates are a little better on that, but we’ve been surprised with ear infections at well-baby checkups multiple times, and overall my average is really fairly low.
Heather Guymon
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 14:31Yep, four kids here too. We bring our kids in at the first sign of….I dunno. Good thing I went with my gut with my oldest though. Thought it was a simple UTI and ended up being Type 1 diabetes, which could have killed her. Quickly.
I still don’t know shit. Well, I do know Type 1 diabetes pretty damn well, now. I keep her alive and stuff. Sometimes I impress myself. Sometimes I hide in the bathroom with an entire bag of cookies and cry until they stop banging on the door and sticking their tiny fingers under the door. I’m super awesome like that.
Laura
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 14:37UGH! Finally you put it to words – baby illnesses are so damn frustrating and you hit the nail on the head. I’m just grateful our little gal has been mostly healthy. And honestly, I’m convinced it’s mostly because of breastfeeding. I’ve used that stuff on a few things (my own ailments included) and it’s miracle juice!
itzybellababy
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 14:47yep, and the other thing- you will never be right about taking them or not taking them for ever. And no matter what you do, someone will judge you, or tell you to do do xyz and if you did that, you did it wrong.
lol
That being said, I am certain that breastmilk cures everything. As soon as my daughter weaned she had about 576897 plagues. (and so did I)
http://itzybellababy.blogspot.com
Jo Eberhardt
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 15:50Yup. I once took my 1yr old in because he was acting just like himself, no complaints at all, but he’d had a low grade fever for four days. My 5yo (who assured me he was really sick — while jumping on the bed, laughing, and generally acting like a 5yo) came with me. When we got to the doctor’s office, my perfectly-fine 5yo suddenly went ash-gray and collapsed in my lap.
Yeah, turns out he had double pneumonia, and at that EXACT MOMENT stopped getting enough oxygen into his lungs. We had to be rushed to the ER in an ambulance, and ended up there for days. Oh, and my 1yo had a chest infection, a throat infection, and two middle ear infections. Making me feel like the most inattentive mother EVER.
Emily
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 12:18Holy shit! Double pneumonia sounds like being allergic to bees–like, why is that even necessary? The first thing is already bad enough.
How lucky that you were there! That’s… I just can’t imagine. That had to be awful. And your poor baby, lol! This year has been so hard on us (we have a 3yo and 1yo) that I was never sure whether what they had was the previous thing or the next thing.
dana
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 18:27Yup, it always happened. You take the child in and it’s ‘just a virus’ again. But when you don’t take her in and then finally you do, that’s when it should’ve been treated sooner.
Erin
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 19:43Nope, not alone. I chose to wait until the ear was goopy before calling the doctor. Those little $uckers can withstand some serious shit before intervention. Admittedly, I’m lucky- #1 had RSV at 4 mos and then …. the aforementioned ear infection of #3 at age 5. And that’s it for my kid illnesses. Those crazy germ-infested/germ-rejectors are the bane of a mother’s existence!
Lizzie
Monday, 13 April, 2015 at 13:47My youngest had what we thought was a cold for a few days. Coughing, the whole nine yards. I had decided to make an appointment for him to be seen when I got home from class one day. Well, that morning, he got his finger slammed in the door and had to go to the ER. Turned out his “cold” was actually RSV so he got to spend the next few days in the hospital on oxygen after they superglued his finger back on. (Due to the RSV, they didn’t want to take him up to surgery and put him under anesthesia)
Carrie
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 20:05It is frustrating and yes everyone seems to be down with colds and crap. Then I got walking pneumonia (thanks government-google it) and then so did my super scrawny youngest child. She’s like 36 lbs and is 6. So anytime she gets “sick” I freak out. First time on medicine for her and first time in 12 years for me. Ug! Come on good weather! Let’s kick this crap out!
Carolyn
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 22:24I have 3 and although I used to be a “frequent flyer” at my kids’ doctor, after 100+ office visits with nothing wrong, I became a little more relaxed. while I used to suspect SARS, birth anomaly, rare disease, what have you, i calmed down after years of being flat out wrong. Lately there have been more times that I thought my kid was fine but ended up not being fine. Last April, I brought my youngest in on week 3 of a stomach bug and he ended up being hospitalized for a week. Brought same kid in when he bumped his head this past January thinking Im gonna be crazy mom again, and he ended up being transported via ambulance from doctors office to hospital with a “severe concussion”. I’ve decided that after 8 years and 3 kids, not only do I not know shit, but when i think that I do know, the opposite is probably true. So, my advice is to err on the side of being crazy mom and just bring them in every time something is wrong and then every other day until they are better.
mel
Tuesday, 7 April, 2015 at 22:24We’ve just had the coughing when lying down, coughing for two hours and crying, coughing and gasping for breath so we went to doc, he coughed in the waiting room, we get in there – nothing. Zip. He was transfixed by the very attractive lady doctor and held her hands, in total silence. Let her remove his vest while staring. Afterwards me and my husband admitted we were seething and thinking, ‘fucking cough you’re making us look mental!’
Poor little soul continued to cough in night for the rest of the weekend, a panic – purchase humidifier doing nothing useful (but we’re still using it, damn it).
Five days on, the cough ‘may’ have finished. Probably to make room for the next!
Lyndsy
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 5:10Yup, Janelle thank you once again for making my morning
I thought I’d be an expert by #4–ha!
They’re all our babies, though and when they’re sick it just breaks my heart.
I hate it and want it to be OVER!
Lizzie
Monday, 13 April, 2015 at 13:50I have five and they constantly remind me I know nothing. Heck, I’m even in school to be a medical assistant and I still know nothing when it comes to my sons.
em
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 8:06my mom, a registered nurse & mother of six, almost never took us to the doctor–we pretty much had to have a really convincingly gaping wound to score a doctor’s visit. i remember once during a really bad virus telling her, “mom! my ears are ringing.” she told me to answer them. i vowed i would take my own children’s illnesses seriously and tend to them & nurture them, etc. four kids & a million viruses later i’m gaining some empathy & understanding for my mom. your advice is awesome & completely accurate in my experience.
Emily
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 12:20There’s a recent post over at Adventures of a Labor Nurse about having a nurse for a mom, and it’s really funny! She talks about that exact thing.
Cristine
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 10:51I have 3 kids the oldest is 22 when he was 17 he kept complaining of a sore throat I being the super mom I am kept giving him Advil and telling him he would be fine. Finally after his 3rd day of bitching I took him to the walk in clinic and they sent us directly over to the E.R. And told me he had tonsillitis and was almost to the point where his throat was swollen shut oops
Lisa
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 12:32I couldn’t finish reading it because of the language. You would probably have a lot more readers if you would clean it up.
Kellie
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 20:44Get your panties out of a wad. If you don’t care for her style don’t read her blog; don’t presume to critique her writing style. There is nothing wrong with her language, Shakespeare used vulgarity too.
Loriann
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 13:58I too have 4 kids. I don’t try to know it all. But I have found that if I listen to morher’s intuition I am usually right, but not always. When my youngest was 3weeks old he woke up gasping for air and a little blue. I took him in right away. The doc said he was fine just a cold. I told him babies are not blue…he is not a smurf. I left the office and headed straight for the ER where he was admitted and put in the ICU for a week with RSV which caused double pneumonia. Also a few years ago my 15 yr old son told me he was fine. I could fry an egg on his head and he had a rash developing on his wrists. The ER said Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever. However years ago I was taking my youngest to a well child check when my oldest, who had been running around playing and riding her bike for hours said she had cramps and didint want to stay with the sitter. I let her come but though she was fine. Youngest was fine. She had appendicitis!
Esskayh
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 15:14i’m so sick of going in for nothing that I bought an otoscope AND a stethoscope for home. I have a BA in English Lit so of course I have no fucking idea what I’m looking at but I have gotten good at picking up wheezing sounds in his lungs (he’s got asthma). As for his ears, if he ever stuffs a Shakespearian sonnet in one of them I’ll be able to identify it! My hubby is a DDS and refuses to play my reindeer games and says just got to the doc. Kill joy.
Melissa
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 18:56please keep writing using “language”. These are the words I use with my very best girlfriends. It makes me feel like I’m in your intimate circle. I love it.
Carol A
Wednesday, 8 April, 2015 at 20:40I completely understand, and I am laughing myself silly. When my son was little, the pediatrician had a new resident training with him. She evaluated my son and the pediatrician asked her recommendations, then he asked me. I got the jelly bean that day. But I never hesitated to take him in – I’m PAYING them for Pete’s sake. If I didn’t run in every time there was a bit of snot, how would they be able to live in that big ol’ house? 😉
Diana
Thursday, 9 April, 2015 at 7:46I bought an otoscope – best purchase ever! – so all those “I don’t feel good” times when I’d rush to the dr & there’s no ear infection only to turn into one 2 days laters resulting in another visit. I take this on travel with us, too, cuz an ear infection ALWAYS happens away from home (there’s a really nice childrens urgent care in Orlando). Also, I have a stethoscope for those coughs. It’s a cheap one & I can hear clear lungs. They save a lot of time & dr visits.
Melanie Murrish
Thursday, 9 April, 2015 at 9:28Bwahahahaha!!!
Kandie
Thursday, 9 April, 2015 at 12:11My 6 yr old started complaining Monday night that she had a headache and didn’t feel good. She didn’t feel warm so I gave her a shot of Tylenol and told her we would see how she felt in the morning. I woke her up at 7 to get ready for school and she didn’t want to wake up. (Nothing new there.) So I lean down to kiss her forehead and start to say ‘good morning princess’ and instead said ‘goodfuckinglordyoureburningup!’. Then immediately felt like an asshole because I forgot last night events and was knocking on the door and being loud. So I crept to the trust Vicks TherMOMeter and immediately feel worse. 102.9. Her worst temp was 104.5 and I called the doctor in the morning. She wasn’t eating or drinking a lot but she would get Tylenol and the fever would drop and she’d be playing games. Doctor said she has a sinus infection. No school til Monday and strong antibiotics. She had a fluctuating fever for three days. I hope one of these kids grows up to be a doctor. I can’t afford all the visits and maybe then they’ll understand I wasn’t over or under reacting. I was just trying my best with what I had to work with.
Tracy
Thursday, 9 April, 2015 at 13:35I usually tried to wait as long as possible so as not to take my kids in for nothing. And then one time it turned out to be appendicitis and I felt like a moron for not taking her in sooner. You can’t win.
Em
Thursday, 9 April, 2015 at 14:20I am a nurse and a mother of four and if you knew how many times I brought my kids to the doctor, certain they had appendicitis or worse to find out they were constipated, you would take my license away. My kids have been x-rayed only to find out they are literally full of shit. Mother of the year! Hey doctor, see you tomorrow at work where I will try to convince you I am qualified to take care of other people when I can’t spot constipation in my own kid.
Leanna
Friday, 10 April, 2015 at 6:08OMG this is genius. My daughter (who is 13 and my second child) just spent the majority of the week home sick with a bad cold – with her asthma I am cautious. Then yesterday we finally went to a walk-in emergency room when the asthma started to get worse. Wanted the Dr to listen to her lungs and see if she needed an antibiotic. He practically screamed at us that “It’s a virus and she sounds FINE, you idiot!!” (OK I added the ‘idiot’, but that is exactly how it felt). Nice to know no one else freaking knows how to tell, either. Seriously the best blog EVER!! Thank you!
Susie
Monday, 13 April, 2015 at 7:51Day three of a 102.9 fever, and I’d been told not to bring him in unless it hit 103.
Mega-nap during which I leave to run errands that could have waited.
Return home to find husband has been snuggling uber lethargic kiddo for the last hour, wondering if he should call me.
I load husband and kid into our only car and drive to the ER.
Two hours later we get in.
Four hours later we have a diagnosis of, and I quote, “an impressive case of constipation.”
And all I can think is “well, shit.”
Charlie
Saturday, 18 April, 2015 at 14:05I’m a doctor. If my kid looks sick I take him to the doctor*. I’m his mother, it’s not my job to work out if it’s serious or not.
*we go every week because there’s some serious shit around man, I know because I see it every day at work. 😉
Molly
Saturday, 25 April, 2015 at 10:33Oh my God, I love this!!! I want to post it to my blog but I don’t have one yet.
Marie
Tuesday, 19 May, 2015 at 10:35You forgot one thing:
I DONT take them in because I’m now convinced they will get better in one day and it’s so hard to get their with four children.
and THAT ONE time…it’s pneumonia. haha.
Lacey
Friday, 5 June, 2015 at 9:28I laughed so very hard at this. I thank you for that. The spouse is deployed and my son has been in and out of the hospital basically since he was born. So, I needed it. I can’t tell you how many nights I spent holding his little fist and crying. From the time he was two months up until he was 5 months (little man is now 6 months), my son had a horrible cough and could NOT breathe out his nose. He would quit breathing because he couldn’t physically take a breath. So, I would rush him into the ER. They kept telling me it was just a case of bronchiolitis and that it would go away on it’s own. Finally he got to the point where he was projectile vomitting just mucus a couple times a day. It was terrifying. I finally told my boss to shove it, because I honestly felt like my son would die if he didn’t get help. He had spent the night before on another ER bed with breathing tubes down his throat. When I got in with his pediatrician, she immediately said that it wasn’t bronchiolitis and was actually the worst case of chronic sinusitis that she’d ever seen in an infant. I was told that if it had gone on that way for a couple more weeks that he would’ve developed brain abscesses and meningitis. Both of which would likely kill him. I was so angry that he had been continually misdiagnosed for almost 3 months. Especially since sinusitis just needs antibiotics for 10 days to clear up. My son ended up getting a tablespoon of amoxicillin twice a day. Which is what you give a full grown adult. Moral of the story: go with your gut and get a second opinion if you feel like you really need it.
Natalie Wahl
Thursday, 23 July, 2015 at 15:11I have a son with ADHD and autism. He wasn’t diagnosed until he was 8. He NEVER looks or acts sick. He can put pressure on broken bones, endure stitches without a hitch, but freaks over paper cuts and splinters. He even says his hair hurts whenever I dare cut it.
I have to make the doctors listen to his lungs. He gets bronchitis every time he gets a cold, thanks to RSV as a baby and asthma now. They always tell me I’m wrong, then listen and take it back. I just tell them to humor me. I hate being treated like an idiot, especially since I have many chronic medical conditions, and he has obvious issues. The second best story is my son went in, was diagnosed with a severe case of bronchitis, given antibiotics, steroids, the works. All the while he was climbing the walls, swinging from the door handles and investigating every nook and cranny, including the back of the doctor’s “office” area. I asked for an ADHD evaluation. The doctor argued with me, and made me come back in a month. So I did. His pediatrician from birth was shocked when the evaluation came back positive. He also told me that he would have thought my son had Oppositional Defiant Disorder. We found a new doctor after that. If you can’t tell how busy and overwhelming my kid is after 5 years, then we need someone more observant.
Marilyn T Cade
Friday, 8 April, 2016 at 6:51It is no easier for doctors and their families when it comes to your own kids. My husband is a pediatrician turned ER doc, I’m a nurse, our daughter is a PA, her husband is family practice, my son is an ER doctor and we all live near each other. We totally go through the exact same thought process, and feel even more like morons when we finally take the kiddo to the REAL doctor, i.e., not a family member. I’ve tried both joking and groveling to cover up my embarrassment. Then there came the day our 9 yr old daughter had her first asthma attack and I had to get reinforcement from a neighbor that she needed to go to the ER. Her own dad was the ER doc and was upset that I had “overreacted”; he then spent her whole hospital stay sleeping on the floor next to her bed. All I can say is if your gut feeling is go to the doctor, then go to the doctor. I am against doctor shopping, but if you think you are not getting through, get a second opinion. You are your child’s ONLY advocate, being a moron be damned. New scenario, we grandparents are now in our 70s, and our children are worried about us and any symptom we might have (finally!) and of course they don’t agree on anything.
Ashley
Tuesday, 18 April, 2017 at 1:59I have a 6month old and she has had a cold clue the past 3 weeks. She had doctors appointment on Tuesday and they said it’s a virus. Woke up at 2am coughing and i could hear the crackling in her chest. I gave her to my mom (she had 3) as i ran around getting a charger ready too goo to the ER. She says well she’s not retracting. Her nostrils aren’t flaring. Just leave her home with me. My question then was, why do i have to wait until she’s struggling to breathe? I mean i know it’s hard to breathe cause you can hear the congestion. So as we lay here. She continues to cough and not retract. We wait until she’s gasping for air because Motrin is keeping the fever at bay. . . this post let me know Im not over reacting. Feels good to know even mothers of multiples still go through the motions. Out made me laugh and be ok with wanting to take her to the ER!!!!